I have been an athiest since I was 11 years old.
It was a Sunday morning. My oldest sister was 17 at the time, and she asked me what I thought about religion. I told her I pictured God as a man with a red beard and arms extending out to everyone everywhere, and she asked me, “Doesn’t it all seem a little ridiculous though?” And I thought about, and realized yes, it does. I stopped believing in God that day.
I never ask people about their religion, or whether they believe in God. I do not want to know. I gave up finding a boyfriend who was an athiest like me, and still possessed all the other qualities I want in a man. I simply do not want to know.
The other night I met Greg at a party, who studies philosophy like me. We both love Nietszche, and we proceeded to discuss his philosophy for an hour. Greg asked me if my then boyfriend, Maurice, believed in God. I told him I did not know, I was afraid to ask because I suspected yes. I cannot feel the same about someone if they believe in God, I must confess, I am prejudiced. Greg told me I deserved someone smarter. He was hitting on me.
Greg is very smart, but he is not attractive. He is fat. He told me,
“You are a rarity- really attractive and really smart at the same time.”
“I know, I feel the same way, but I feel like there is no one in the world to appreciate it. Or rather, that there is no one whose appreciation I appreciate appreciating it,” I told him.
I asked Maurice about his opinion on religion the day after that. He confessed his Catholicism. The first seed of my dissatisfaction with him was planted, and I know that since I broke up with him yesterday I will never go back to him. And why not? Because after I told him it was over, he said,
“Maybe we will be together again one day. God knows, and maybe he will want us together again.”
August 8, 2008 at 3:03 pm |
There is definitely something that makes it hard to speak to someone who is religious. Dating is even harder. For me, it makes a person seem more impenetrable. Christians can simply justify every statement with “God did it,” and call it a day.
I’m curious though—what problem do you have with the religious? Does zeal make a person look more…irrational? Does it simply remind you of the worst days in Sunday-school?
August 8, 2008 at 3:29 pm |
The problem I have with religion is yes, the irrationality of it. I see it as an escape from this world and a justification for pain. I think religion in general chooses “afterlife” at the expense of the here and now.